Don't tell me what I can't do!!

Ever since I was little I have always done things my own way and in my own time. For example, as a kid if I had made the decision to clean my room on my own I would happily spend hours tidying and organizing, but, if my Mom told me to clean my room, I no longer wanted to!! It also works this way when someone tells me I can't do something! The more I'm told I can't, the more I want to prove that I can!!

Since being diagnosed with MS I sometimes feel like I have even more to prove than I did before, it's almost like I need to prove that I am still capable.....and I know what you're probably thinking, "you don't need to prove yourself to anyone"!! You're right, I don't need to prove myself to anyone. It's not others that I'm proving myself to though, I feel like I need to prove to myself that I am still capable.

The week leading up to me being in the hospital I was still a fairly active person, but after my week stay I left the hospital unable to do a lot of the things I did before. One of the hardest parts of being in the hospital was listening to the people around me talk about all the things I could no longer do.

-No more taekwondo
-No more archery
-No more Santa booth
-No more cleaning and shoveling for seniors
-No more helping the school
-This list could go on forever......

Christmas Eve 2016 at the best job on the planet!!
Approx. 3 months before diagnosis.

Me receiving my green stripe in
taekwondo!!

I know that these things were only said out of concern for me, but, hearing all of the things people thought I should no longer do was worse than being told I have MS! If I couldn't do all the things that made me ME then who was I?!

Everything on the "can't do" list has been done at least once in the last 3 years.
-I never officially went back to taekwondo class but I have completed the basic pattern at home! It was not easy but I can at least say that I have done it.
-I worked 2 more seasons at the Santa booth, thanks to my amazing boss who went above and beyond with accommodations for me
-I cleaned for 1 senior client for a couple of months before we agreed that it was too much for me.
-I have continued to help at the school when I can. It's not on a daily basis like before but I'm there for all special functions to help in any way possible.

January 14th, 2020
I shot my bow for the first time since
being diagnosed!

-I have also shot my bow 10 times! I think I might be more excited about the 10 arrows I shot post diagnosis than any of the ones before!!

Doing these things that people no longer believed I could has been empowering, it has made me realize that even though MS sucks, I don't have to let it run my life. Some days it wins, and I have to learn to be ok with that and rest. Other days I say f*@K you to MS, do what I want and deal with the consequences later!!

MS is hard, and we don't need our loved ones to make it harder, we need support with our decisions to try, we need comfort when we've pushed to hard, and sometimes we need encouragement to keep going!!