Birthdays and Holidays While Social Distancing

This last week was supposed to be filled with multiple birthday parties and Easter celebrations, but with the current state of the world....you know, global pandemic and all that didn't happen!

My son Taylor was the first of the April birthday's, I made a giant sign out of poster board that read "Honk for a Happy 15th Birthday!" Sadly not many people honked for him, he had about 6 total I think. Throughout the day a family friend, and 2 school friends drove by, we were both feeling pretty discouraged. This was nothing like the videos people had been posting of their communities coming out to wish kids a Happy birthday.

His Aunt's, Uncle, cousin's and Grandma drove by in the evening with Happy Birthday playing from the cars. Taylor felt pretty special in that moment, especially since we had just taken his sign down and decided that was it for the day.

Mine and my nieces birthday were on the 8th. We didn't really do anything for my birthday, which sucked because I haven't done anything for my birthday in a loooong time (we won't get into the why of that for now) and I had actually decided that I would like to do something this year. I really should've known better....

My first attempt at a shadow box!
I'm now obsessed with making them!!

As for my niece, luckily I had done most of her birthday shopping before everything closed so I at least had a gift for her! (Unlike for my boys who I had to scramble for and hope everything shipped on time, luckily everything has arrived) My boys and I painted a happy birthday banner to stand at the end of the walkway with, we had Birthday by the Beatles playing from the car but I don't think they could hear it, and we dropped off her gifts. One of the gifts was an Eiffel Tower shadowbox (I had to drop it off the next day since the frame didn't come in time) that I worked hard on (there was blood, sweat, and a few f-bombs that went into making it) and I just had to leave it on the doorstep.....that has to
be the saddest way to wish someone a happy birthday!

Next up was Easter, we hadn't planned on a big turkey dinner for the 4 of us but the boys decided that they MUST have turkey! So we made a turkey on Friday, and offered to make plates for the Grandparents that could be left on the step for pick up.

On Saturday we delivered Easter gifts to one side of the family. (the other side is holding out hope that this will all be over soon so I saved theirs for now) Braden has a giant dress up bunny head so He brought it along so he could surprise everyone with being the Easter Bunny. Once we were done our drop offs it was time to wait for Grandma to make her rounds.

Now with all of that you'd think we'd be done with celebrations, but we're not! We have one more birthday to celebrate on the 16th. Lucky for us the thing that makes Braden the most happy is when someone will play a game with him!! So even if he doesn't get a lot of honks I think he'll be happy with his day as long as the 4 of us can play a game!

This isn't how any of us want to spend birthdays and holidays, but for now unfortunately it is the new norm and we really do just need to make the best of it. I'm not saying that it will be easy, \i'm not great at it myself, but I am trying!

How was your Easter? Are you missing out on other celebrations? What are you doing instead of gatherings?

MS Walk 2020

Today, April 7th, marks 3 years since I left the hospital after my MS diagnosis. April 7 is also the day after my oldest son's birthday and the day before mine and my nieces. My younger son's birthday is also in April, on the 16th. We did not expect to spend our birthdays in isolation , but here we are.

It was also right around this time 3 years ago that I discovered the MS walk! I just happened to be scrolling on my phone and there it was, right away I knew I was doing it!! I mentioned participating to Trevor and our boys and they were all on board, as well as my sister-in-law.

We walked in 2017 and 2018 (Taylor and I were speakers at this one), missed 2019 due to a family function but my boys still hosted their bake sale in support of the MS society. To date I think our team has raised around $5000!!

This year though, things are looking a little different due to the COVID-19 pandemic....
With the schools being closed there was no school bake sale, our grocery store bake sale has also been cancelled for obvious reasons as well. Normally my boys and I are busy creating items to sell or auction off in support of our walk team but with social distancing and trying hard not to share germs we haven't been able to do a lot to raise funds. We knew that things would be different this time, we just weren't sure how different...we're still not 100% sure!

As of yesterday when I received a call from my local MS Society to tell me that the physical walk has been cancelled! While I absolutely understand this decision, it definitely makes me sad! This walk was the first thing I did after my diagnosis that made me feel like I could actually do something about this monster that has taken over my body, and now that is gone too!

While I'm sad that the physical walk is cancelled I'm being told that a plan is being made to do a virtual walk on May 24th....I'm not sure what that will look like but I'm excited to see what they come up with!

As you read above, Taylor and I spoke at the 2018 walk and this year my family as a whole was asked to speak and tell our story. I'm sure Trevor is happy that he's not going on stage anymore, haha! The MS  Society is still wanting us as guest speakers, we just need to work on how that will look going forward.

So, I am going to continue to fund raise while I wait to hear how this years walk is going to look! If you are able to donate to this cause I will be forever grateful, no amount is too small!! I have linked all of my families walk pages though out this post and we will all be updating our "why we walk" stories shortly!

Me and my mobility aids

In about a week I will be turning 35, I am a 35 year old with 4 different mobility aids!!! This is not how I imagined my life....
I know that my mobility aids are meant to help me function in the daily world, but I would really rather not have to use them.

I own a cane, rollator (walker), wheelchair, and power scooter. I use all 4 for different things and at different times of the year.

Of the 4 I use my cane most often, I mainly use it for my daily errands. I fought the idea of using a mobility aid on a regular basis until my chiropractor said to me one day "it's not always about the cane helping you, it's a reminder to those around you that you may be a little slower and to be patient with you." I had never looked at it this way, but it makes a lot of sense to me!

I use my rollator (walker) mostly in the colder months or when my fatigue us getting the best of me. You see, when my body thinks it's cold EVERYTHING gets stiff and it makes walking almost impossible.  I've also used my walker when I would like to go for a longer walk with my family, it was a good place to rest when my legs got tired.

I also have a wheelchair, I don't use it a whole lot though.....for many reasons. I am unable to use my wheelchair on my own because my arms are no where near strong enough to move the wheelchair. I'm also not a big fan of bossing my husband around when he has to push me, (he swears he doesn't mind) or the looks I get from people if I stand up from my chair!

 I have used my wheelchair for bigger shopping trips with my family, our first MS walk, and while camping the first summer after my diagnosis. It's not my most favourite mobility aid but it definitely has it's uses.

I think my boys favourite mobility aid of mine is my power scooter, I don't mind it either. I bought my scooter from our local lending cupboard, which I think is a great way to get what you need for a lot less money and helping out a wonderful community organization. I bought the scooter to keep up with my family's outdoor activities, and I must say it definitely helps me keep up without the exhaustion.

While I'm not a huge fan of having to use mobility aids at only 35, I do realize that it is for my own good!

WOW!!

Wow, what a crazy few weeks it has been!! I don't even know where to start.....The last time I wrote it was about my thoughts on the COVID-19 pandemic. Since then a lot has changed throughout the world!

Schools are closed, costco and superstore are absolute zoos (way more so than ever before), most non essential businesses are closed, our borders are closed, and people are fighting over toilet paper!!

Last week my boys and I just took it easy, I had them work on some basic school stuff while we waited for our teachers to put together the new online learning that they will now be doing. I must say our school board and both schools that my boys attend have been AMAZING through all of this! 

We started the online learning Monday of this week and so far it's gone pretty smoothly! Luckily both Taylor and Braden enjoy school and want to do well. 

For me it was a bit of a challenge, from the time I got up in the morning until about supper time I kept quite busy with setting up my boys' school stuff, tidying the house, and other Mom stuff. I should've known better but wanted to keep busy while my boys were doing their work....you know, the whole "kids learn what the live/see"..... basically I didn't want to sit around on the couch while making my kids do work.

We've chatted about it an all agree that I don't need to walk them through everything, I'm here to help when needed!! 

Other than helping my boys keep up on school work during this time I've been figuring out my new cricut machine! I originally got it to help me with my scrapbooking that I'm trying to get caught up on....I'm still working on stuff from 2014!! I thought that if I had a machine like this it would help with my limited fine motor skills and save me from exhaustion from forcing my hands to do what they clearly don't want to do!

But, if you know me you know that I don't do anything the easy way, as soon as I realized all that I could do with my cricut I had to try it all!! My fine motor skills are definitely getting a work out now dealing with all of the small pieces! It's definitely been a challenge as well as frustrating and exhausting at times but I'm figuring it out and am enjoying it for the most part!!

My boys and I have also been busy decorating our windows with Easter pictures (this is one of the many things I've been using my cricut for) for the Easter Egg Hunt 2020 with Social Distancing!! If you have't heard of it I strongly suggest you check it out, it's bringing people together from all over the globe!

We're all trying to figure out our new normal! What are you and your family doing to entertain yourselves during this time?

On a side note, if you need to do some shopping or are out and about in the world please have patience, keep your distance, be kind to one another, and please stop hoarding toilet paper!!

My thoughts on COVID-19

Updated March 2022

As the world tries to recover from COVID here are my thoughts...

It's NOT about COVID anymore and it hasn't been for me for a LONG time now. What do I mean by that? I mean that we shouldn't have to be told by the government to stay home when sick, we shouldn't need to CONSTANTLY remind people to stay away when sick....for me this is about RESPECTING other's health. 

If you're sick stay home as much as possible, don't go to social events, avoid elderly or immune compromised loved ones. 

But, with saying this please don't forget about your elderly or immune compromised loved ones.....these last 2+ years have been INCREDIBLY lonely as most people around me have been able to live fairly social lives. For them I am glad, but I'd be lying if I said I haven't been hurt being left behind and like not many are making an effort to SAFELY be around. 

It would be nice to not have to worry about my health as much as I do and just go on with life like everyone would like to but for me, this isn't about COVID, it's about staying healthy in general!

Everyone else is talking about it so I guess I will too, COVID-19.....

Am I scared of it?

Yes and no! I'm not running around stocking up on unnecessary toilet paper and other non-essentials. I am however limiting my exposure to those who have been travelling.  My reasons for this are not just because I have MS, my reasons for this are very simple, I catch EVERYTHING!! I've had the norwalk virus while pregnant, I've had h1n1 twice, multiple rounds of bronchitis, mono more than once, the list could go on forever but you get the point! If I can catch it I probably will!!

What am I doing to protect me and my family?

My family and I are basically doing everything we would normally do. We're making sure to wash our hands when we come home, the boys have hand sanitizer with them at school for those times when washing your hands isn't possible, and we're reminding friends/family that if they aren't feeling  well that they need to stay away. The biggest change for us is the rescheduling of Easter and April birthdays. We have family that will be travelling right before so to be cautious we have decided to celebrate Easter and April birthdays before they all leave.

Why do I want to avoid getting sick, besides the obvious?!

Obviously nobody wants to get sick, but for some getting sick is more than just a minor inconvenience. The last time I got sick I was down for days, I ended up at the doctor for help and my husband missed more than a day of work to take care of me. I was not well enough to be left home alone as I could not even walk to the bathroom without help. I don't want to get sick for many reasons, here are the main ones

-I don't want to lose my ability to walk again (this happens to me more than you might think)

-I don't want to be too exhausted to eat/drink causing me to lose weight that I cannot afford to lose (my dietitians words, not mine)

-I don't want a relapse that could potentially cause more symptoms for me to deal with daily

-I don't want my husband to have to take care of me, I don't want to be a burden!!

Please, if you're feeling unwell or have been travelling,
 keep your distance!

What am I asking for from those around me?

Since being diagnosed almost 3 years ago I have made it a point of not being around people who are under the weather. I'm asking family and friends that if they are unwell to at least make me aware so I can make an informed decision on whether or not to attend an event. Right now I'm also asking people to please let me know if they have recently traveled. Other than that I don't really expect much from those around me.

I'm not a hugger!!

Have you ever had the wind knocked out of you? I had it happen many times as a kid, I was a bit clumsy and fell off the monkey bars more than once! I never got used to the feeling, every time it happened I would cry, and almost start to panic! What does this have to do with me having MS? Well, that feeling of having the wind knocked out of me is very similar to the feeling of one of my least favourite MS symptoms....the MS HUG!!

The MS hug is also known as banding or girdling, it can feel like having a tight band wrapped around your torso (depending on who you ask you'll find different info about where the MS Hug can be felt on the body. I have banding around one of my feet as well.) The MS Hug is caused by spasms in the small muscles between the ribs. How long an MS Hug lasts is anybody's guess, they can come and go lasting only a couple of seconds at a time, they can also last for several days!!

My very first MS Hug was terrifying, it happened about 4-5 months before landing in the hospital. One night after taekwondo class when getting in to bed I all of the sudden felt like I was being crushed! I couldn't catch my breathe, my chest hurt so bad, I was scared. Trevor and I tried everything to make me feel better.....I'm not sure what we eventually ended up doing to help the pain but I eventually fell asleep.

I woke up the next morning feeling better but still in some pain, my cousin insisted that I go get checked out by a Dr. She even threatened that if I didn't go she'd tell my Grandma on me if I didn't go!! If you know me at all, you know that I always do what Grandma says!!

I went to the Dr. and it was suggested that maybe I took a kick to hard in taekwondo class and dislocated my xiphoid bone, that's a funny little bone at the base of your ribs. This is actually quite a common injury for people who participate in martial arts. After the Dr. looked at my x-rays it was decided that my bone was in place but that there was some major inflammation around the area. I was prescribed anti-inflammatories and told to take some time off from taekwondo.

The xiphoid bone is the little bone at
the bottom of the picture.

I did as I was told and never thought too much more of it. The pain would come and go throughout the months but I just brushed it off as an old injury. 

It wasn't until I was in the hospital in March/April of 2017 that everything got pieced together by a nurse that noticed I was holding my ribs. She asked me what the pain felt like, and then began to tell me that the tightness and pressure I was feeling was very common for people with MS. At the time I was glad to hear that it was a common symptom because that meant I was "normal" and wasn't just a clumsy mess in taekwondo class. I now wish I was just a clumsy mess and never had to deal with this pain again!!

I've never really been much of a hugger, so to be diagnosed with with a condition that has a symptom called the MS Hug seems a little ironic to me!!

So, now that I've told you about my least favourite symptom, what can I do about it? None of the meds I currently take really help with this type of pain unfortunately. What I have found to help is rest and pressure. My MS Hugs tend to happen when I'm tired or have over exerted myself. Sometimes they're intense but not long lived, and other times they're less intense but can go on for hours....even days.

When they're intense but short lived I try and do my best to just rest until it passes. For the more persistent long lasting MS Hugs I actually wear a corset. I'm not sure why the pressure helps but for me, it does.

The last time I was dealing with an MS Hug I turned to Dr.Google to see what was suggested to feel better....

How to Manage the MS Hug

1. Apply a warm compress. (Be careful: Heat might make your pain worse.)
2. Drink plenty of water.
3. Eat healthy food.
4. Get a massage.
5. Stay rested. Get at least 8 hours of sleep each night.
6. Use deep breathing techniques, yoga, and meditation.
7. Wear loose, comfortable clothing.
8. Wear tight clothes.

Basically, in my opinion, this list is saying no two people experience MS or it's symptoms the same way, so do whatever works for you!

As much as I hate the MS Hug,
I'll still take hugs from my Trevor any day!!

Don't tell me what I can't do!!

Ever since I was little I have always done things my own way and in my own time. For example, as a kid if I had made the decision to clean my room on my own I would happily spend hours tidying and organizing, but, if my Mom told me to clean my room, I no longer wanted to!! It also works this way when someone tells me I can't do something! The more I'm told I can't, the more I want to prove that I can!!

Since being diagnosed with MS I sometimes feel like I have even more to prove than I did before, it's almost like I need to prove that I am still capable.....and I know what you're probably thinking, "you don't need to prove yourself to anyone"!! You're right, I don't need to prove myself to anyone. It's not others that I'm proving myself to though, I feel like I need to prove to myself that I am still capable.

The week leading up to me being in the hospital I was still a fairly active person, but after my week stay I left the hospital unable to do a lot of the things I did before. One of the hardest parts of being in the hospital was listening to the people around me talk about all the things I could no longer do.

-No more taekwondo
-No more archery
-No more Santa booth
-No more cleaning and shoveling for seniors
-No more helping the school
-This list could go on forever......

Christmas Eve 2016 at the best job on the planet!!
Approx. 3 months before diagnosis.

Me receiving my green stripe in
taekwondo!!

I know that these things were only said out of concern for me, but, hearing all of the things people thought I should no longer do was worse than being told I have MS! If I couldn't do all the things that made me ME then who was I?!

Everything on the "can't do" list has been done at least once in the last 3 years.
-I never officially went back to taekwondo class but I have completed the basic pattern at home! It was not easy but I can at least say that I have done it.
-I worked 2 more seasons at the Santa booth, thanks to my amazing boss who went above and beyond with accommodations for me
-I cleaned for 1 senior client for a couple of months before we agreed that it was too much for me.
-I have continued to help at the school when I can. It's not on a daily basis like before but I'm there for all special functions to help in any way possible.

January 14th, 2020
I shot my bow for the first time since
being diagnosed!

-I have also shot my bow 10 times! I think I might be more excited about the 10 arrows I shot post diagnosis than any of the ones before!!

Doing these things that people no longer believed I could has been empowering, it has made me realize that even though MS sucks, I don't have to let it run my life. Some days it wins, and I have to learn to be ok with that and rest. Other days I say f*@K you to MS, do what I want and deal with the consequences later!!

MS is hard, and we don't need our loved ones to make it harder, we need support with our decisions to try, we need comfort when we've pushed to hard, and sometimes we need encouragement to keep going!!